Flirt Your Way Into Wealth

I didn’t know that there was another career path option I could’ve taken after college.  

Not that it would’ve really been an option for me since the job actually does require charm and good looks. 

Had the job only needed a vast knowledge of Saved by the Bell trivia and Color Me Badd lyrics, then I would’ve been soooo in.

Use Your Ears to See

I probably won’t be posting very many inspirational entries. But I saw this video of a blind teenager who has mastered echo location that I felt like I had to share:

I dare you to play a game of Marco Polo with him. I double-dog dare you.

Answer the Call

Caller ID is one of the best inventions in the last century. Well, okay, not really. But it is really nice to have. It has saved me so much time since it allows me to screen all of those telemarketer calls.

There is a National Do Not Call Registry out there, but it doesn’t stop all telemarketing calls. Political organizations, charities, telephone surveyors, and any company that I have an existing business relationship (e.g. my credit card company, my phone company, etc) are still permitted to call me.

Listen to how one guy handled his telemarketer:

I don’t mind all telemarketing calls though. I actually like taking phone surveys. That’s because I’m hoping that someday, my survey answers will finally take some of those crappy reality shows off the air. That’s right, I’m looking at you, “Making the Band 4”.

Break Hearts

I didn’t do a lot of dating in high school. It was primarily because when I liked a girl, I spent most of my time focused on that person even if she wasn’t really that interested. I was young, naive, and didn’t know any better.

In retrospect, I should have been more man-whorish so that at least my Friday and Saturday nights wouldn’t have been spent hanging around video arcades and going on late night donut runs to Safeway.

Check out how Daniel Radcliffe of Harry Potter fame handles his heartthrob status when he visits a building full of Japanese schoolgirls… (warning: may cause temporary deafness)

Honestly though, I’m not sure if I would’ve been able to handle the responsibility of being a socialite. Besides, I really liked those half-priced donuts.

Play Like a Kid Again

It seems like every game we used to play as kids has been revived for adults. More and more adult leagues have been sprouting up for Dodgeball and Kickball, for example. Even Rock, Paper, Scissors has its own world championships.

So it shouldn’t be a surprise if the game of Tag made a comeback for adults too.

Anything that gets our fat asses off the couch is a good thing.

Make People Laugh

I recently read something mysterious that someone wrote in my high school yearbook.

“…I’ll never forget in Ashland when I heard you say something so funny and so not like what I thought you were like – me and Julie were eavesdropping and it was just soooo funny but I won’t tell you what cuz it’s just so funny…”

It’s been been more than 14 years since it was written. I didn’t pay much attention to it before, but now it bothers me that I don’t know what the author was referring to. I guess it’s bothering me because I never thought I was that funny, and secondly, I want to know what people did think I was like. I know, I have issues.

Here’s some funny material from Demetri Martin to keep you entertained while I try to figure all of this out.

I’m not sure if I’ll ever determine what the yearbook entry means. It is going to haunt me for the rest of my days. Damn you, nostalgia!

Influence People

One can never fully trust the superhero who has the power of mind control. If you can get people to do things against their will, then it seems to be inherently evil. It’s no surprise that supervillains tend to exploit this power more. I mean, it seems like every superhero has had his/her mind controlled by a supervillain at some point… Well, okay, maybe not Aquaman. Seriously, what can he do for them? It’s not like they ever needed someone to clean a dirty aquarium or something.

What’s interesting is that of all the superpowers to choose from, mind control is the one power that is the most attainable in real life. You can learn techniques to make people do what you want them to do. Just promise me to use it for entertainment purposes only and not for evil.

Check out Derren Brown in this video I found.

I heard from my friend Mike that Derren Brown is going to have a show, premiering on July 26th, 2007 on the Sci Fi Channel. For some reason, I am compelled to watch it…