Break Hearts

I didn’t do a lot of dating in high school. It was primarily because when I liked a girl, I spent most of my time focused on that person even if she wasn’t really that interested. I was young, naive, and didn’t know any better.

In retrospect, I should have been more man-whorish so that at least my Friday and Saturday nights wouldn’t have been spent hanging around video arcades and going on late night donut runs to Safeway.

Check out how Daniel Radcliffe of Harry Potter fame handles his heartthrob status when he visits a building full of Japanese schoolgirls… (warning: may cause temporary deafness)

Honestly though, I’m not sure if I would’ve been able to handle the responsibility of being a socialite. Besides, I really liked those half-priced donuts.

Play Like a Kid Again

It seems like every game we used to play as kids has been revived for adults. More and more adult leagues have been sprouting up for Dodgeball and Kickball, for example. Even Rock, Paper, Scissors has its own world championships.

So it shouldn’t be a surprise if the game of Tag made a comeback for adults too.

Anything that gets our fat asses off the couch is a good thing.

Make People Laugh

I recently read something mysterious that someone wrote in my high school yearbook.

“…I’ll never forget in Ashland when I heard you say something so funny and so not like what I thought you were like – me and Julie were eavesdropping and it was just soooo funny but I won’t tell you what cuz it’s just so funny…”

It’s been been more than 14 years since it was written. I didn’t pay much attention to it before, but now it bothers me that I don’t know what the author was referring to. I guess it’s bothering me because I never thought I was that funny, and secondly, I want to know what people did think I was like. I know, I have issues.

Here’s some funny material from Demetri Martin to keep you entertained while I try to figure all of this out.

I’m not sure if I’ll ever determine what the yearbook entry means. It is going to haunt me for the rest of my days. Damn you, nostalgia!

Influence People

One can never fully trust the superhero who has the power of mind control. If you can get people to do things against their will, then it seems to be inherently evil. It’s no surprise that supervillains tend to exploit this power more. I mean, it seems like every superhero has had his/her mind controlled by a supervillain at some point… Well, okay, maybe not Aquaman. Seriously, what can he do for them? It’s not like they ever needed someone to clean a dirty aquarium or something.

What’s interesting is that of all the superpowers to choose from, mind control is the one power that is the most attainable in real life. You can learn techniques to make people do what you want them to do. Just promise me to use it for entertainment purposes only and not for evil.

Check out Derren Brown in this video I found.

I heard from my friend Mike that Derren Brown is going to have a show, premiering on July 26th, 2007 on the Sci Fi Channel. For some reason, I am compelled to watch it…

Revive a Classic

I’ve been trying to figure out what to do with my old PC at home. I don’t even bother turning it on. It just sits there with its slow processor and its low capacity hard drive. I can’t believe how quickly technology gets outdated. If one dog year equals seven human years, how many human years equal one PC year? 20 human years, maybe?

Fortunately, all is not lost. Someone found a way to utilize an Apple II to make a cool video for Grandaddy‘s song “Jed’s Other Poem”.

Break Social Barriers

Back when I was in high school, girls placed a guy into one of four categories:

  • “Cute”: He was pretty much the guy who got away with anything. He set trends and never had problems getting dates on Saturday nights. His confidence was reinforced by the barrage of candygrams during Valentine’s Day. Some girls even pretended he was funny even though they were mainly laughing because he’s cute. Sometimes he was referred to as “sooo cute”.
  • “Funny”: He may not have been the best looking guy around, but he still managed to be surrounded by girls. He was charming and even his fellow guys respected him. Some of those who were referred to as “sooo funny” by the girls even made the jump to the “cute” category at times.
  • “Nice”: It was the category most guys dreaded falling into. He was the guy that girls ask about homework. He was the reliable lab partner. He was the guy that the other guys trust with their girlfriends. He sometimes was able to jump to the “funny” category, but almost never to the “cute” category.
  • “Who?”: He was not really placed in a category at all. In fact, girls rarely acknowledged him, and when they did, they referred to him as “that guy who…” (e.g. “that guy who wears that same unicorn t-shirt everyday”, “that guy who wears a cape”, or “that creepy guy who keeps smelling my hair in Algebra”)

Anyway, I found this short film on YouTube that illustrates the plight of the common “nice guy”.

Part 1:

Part 2:

Part 3:

Unleash Your Inner Rock Star

Music has such a huge influence in our lives that it was only a matter of time until people started emulating their favorite rock stars’ actions.

Here’s a video of a stressed out businessman having a rock star level tantrum:

Rock stars trash hotel rooms. One businessman, on the other hand, trashes hotel lobbies. Maybe the damages are covered by his per diem.